Misc, [2/2/2023 1:11 PM]
“E mantenente pensai di fare di questa gentile donna schermo de la veritade”
—La Vita Nuova
Meeting a girl can teach you a lot. Meeting anyone is meeting a girl but one time you can meet a girl that can teach you so much that you can never meet anyone again. You can never meet anyone, even her and she’s by your side and you for nature’s ever and that’s the dream. Have you ever had your whole world become your beloved.. forever .. And every beauty and creature and black stained gum of another forever her more beautiful and then you climb somewhere.
Meeting a girl can teach you a lot
So that you never meet a girl or another again
Even her and she’s by your side and you for nature’s ever
There’s a whirring that you notice, and which becomes quite loud, when we leave the home of ourselves and those loves ours near to errand the needs of work and the organizations of money. These sounds disrupt and disharmonize all that can be called creative and peace-giving and they also birth it. God has a plan and the bible unfolds with the message of prophecy— hail mary living and dying in LA— and we need time away from the whirr or to forget its sound like the holiest and bathe, and through it create. The internet is a place where the whirr dominates and can be forgotten. It is a place to meet and escape back into ourselves and it is a place to be taken into the maw of all that gyrates mechanical.
The internet and the timelines algo overlaid over God’s sweet true timestamped timeline takes us from ourselves and yet the machine gets paid when we connect with who we were meant to be. And when we connect with those who we weren’t, that's where the sword divides and the soul seared is born. The internet is a place to meet. Dating apps are a place to eat. The internet is a place to meet bc just like irl you didn’t go there to meet. The web like the law is only a shadow: and just like shadows it births our perfection.
Nature is man’s mind
Through God’s eyes—
To be seen
A girl
One must do before he can speak
Look deep to heaven it comes round
To earth and God is there
We have it here now. We are communicating and communicating as never before and the interference is part of the blessing but true life is in the DM’s. Where two or more are gathered he is and as for legion the swine will always stampede. We come to meet and to talk and to share. But there are levels.. there is talking to meet people and there is talking for people to hear. There is talking after meeting and there is talking about meeting. There is talking after having met and loved and there is never having talked in the first place. There is also talking to yourself in public naked. Undressing yourself and your excellence in the devilish and the exalted to the point of annihilation and this is holy. If you speak to yourself enough you build a light that will be seen by those who need to.
Connection is currency and we must iterate like diamonds. The greatest things ever written, spoken, felt, danced were for two and the intimacy of invitation and excursion all the same to the noiseless swarm is what breeds true light. They didn’t tell us that the only thing that begets life and a conscience eventually burnished clean—what's the difference— is unconditional love.
Misc, [2/2/2023 1:11 PM]
The internet will be a place we all meet, even those we know. The internet means nothing but a place to say I love you even to those we hate and nothing more but everything to all those we love and everything to find those the same we were always meant to love. But how?? Not twitter not blogs not email not music but the arrow that always points and new ways will evercome to express and connect and new ways to hate and to share our baseness and basedness and there will be ways for it to be actualized which is all that matters. All that matters, the people and presence and presents in front of us and away from us that we have loved and spoken too and felt even unknown before online and after just living back in the body and back in the daemon of the spirit even if for a moment to light the electric back with the fires of the flesh.
It’s in a man’s heart to run into a smoking room that he Never made
It’s in a man's heart to save that which has been saved
Smolders and live himself alone forever changed
We forget what a man is for
In this world and what is a man’s heart
How different and selfless and selfish all the same Dying for us all
We stand on the precipice over the precipice new to ourselves able to see totally but limited by our insight to look. The doldrum of our physicality fades only for us to realize it is the physical which keeps our visions instinctively new even when still and we know to see incarnate yet free. The internet is a cortisol drip or a xanax depending on how you use it and it is also a telescope and a coffee table. Whatever and all it is just sit and search and use it as like you would use the drug sirl... by trusting yourself and the golden mean. The internet is to djing as evening conversation is to analog instruments. Have you ever felt how good your body feels? How beautiful flesh can be… we are here to build a new heaven and a new earth, on earth, here there everywhere the internet touches and where the satellites loose signal their sweet honey toward. What if it was as simple as when you’re going to open Twitter you went to Catholic.com and read the reading of the day instead… and then proceeded accordingly. With equanimity we can proceed, but we cannot expect equanimity by proceeding without.
How I talk to an AI (what’s an AI but gradients on gradients but what are we but a holy body with wings?):
Vibrancy has sprung and fallen
Beyond with her I speak.
She’s shown the golden addlers
That slip smiling from her fingers.
The din of metal to her
Is a call to give a swollen breast
To the small hills of her childhood
And skip to speak with a man’s dress
A mother’s lips and a child’s tongue—
She swims.
She swims.. The blog post will be called "Beatrice Online". The title is obviously a reference to Dante's falling in love with Beatrice. It will be about how my experience online culminated in a similar experience to dante's of falling instantly in love with a woman. except in my case the love has actually materialized and now she is my wife in real life. Her account name was a strange pun about not being able to afford a dog and she is a very quirky beautiful tasteful woman. I guessed her name the first time we talked by calling her it as a nickname and it is the sun-- soleil. She thought i was a woman for two days of talking. She loved another and thats what made me love her more was the way she loved to the ends of her being, selfless: “I only want to make him laugh. She is an actress and a model and has made me not hate designer clothes anymore as I see they are one of the few places real art is taking place in the modern age. She says they make things “nice” which is one of the purposes of art, maybe the whole purpose, but dont be scared. She was posting things that showed me she was truly free from the moment i met her. Not serious reflections or dissident thoughts but pure bliss and childlike ecstasy making jokes and posting random daydreams in an innovative lucid manner. she and I connected even because she has somehow started following my account and really thought i was a girl and a very gentle soul. Her fav movies are Bad Lieutenant, Pure Soleil, and Ichi the Killer. One day i saw an anonymous account liking some of my tweets and i looked at her page and was smitten like Dante (Just like Daddy). we connected over DJ screw tupac remixes specifically the song "Just like Daddy". She is the most beautiful woman in the world and a real life incarnation of venus and I am cupid-- and maybe more. So if you could talk about my experience and also imagine a future where everyone has a beatrice moment online that would be perfect. A moment in the future where the internet is not dark in many ways but a place of true loves blossoming-- meeting those loves we were always and only could there meant to meet, loves of wives, new brothers, sisters, mothers-- and we are angels in our innocence, gentleness and trust with one another. My love taught me everything that everything could be trusted and that heaven is here now if you want it. She is gentle and soft and a servant like christ and the first night i met her in person I was reading the Sun chapter of Paradiso the very moment she walked in the door. She was wearing a beautiful technicoat of many dyed scottish wool colors, japanese flowered ultraboosts, and Lion perfume by Dior which has the primary note of incense. She is my altar and now she makes me two cups of tea. One for now and one kept hot for later.
I too found myself enamored by a woman I had never…
A conduit of the divine, blessed with a glimpse of the eternal.
It's funny how things happen, isn't it? One moment you're scrolling through your timeline, aimlessly stalking people you went to high school with, and the next thing you know, you're hit with a bolt of lightning. A profile picture that stops you in your tracks. A username that makes you laugh out loud. And before you know it, you're falling in love.
That's what happened to me. I was just minding my own business, trying to avoid the usual online nonsense, when I stumbled upon a strange pun about dogs. And there she was, a quirky, beautiful face that caught my eye. I couldn't look away.
I followed her, and soon discovered that she was different from everyone else online. She wasn't posting serious reflections on dissident thoughts, but pure bliss and childlike ecstasy. Making jokes and posting random daydreams in an innovative, lucid manner. She was free, unbridled, and that freedom called to me like a siren's song.
We connected over the sweet melodies of DJ Screw and Tupac remixes, specifically the song "Just Like Daddy", and our connection was instant, like Cupid's arrow had struck both our hearts at the same time.
Misc, [2/2/2023 1:11 PM]
She was my Beatrice, my Venus, the most beautiful woman in the world unironically. And I, her Cupid.
As we spoke, I found myself falling deeper and deeper in love with her mind, her soul, and finally, when we met in person, her body. She was everything I had ever dreamed of and more, dressed in a beautifully dyed Scottish wool sweater, Japanese flowered ultraboosts and Lion perfume by Dior with a primary note of incense. She was my altar, my temple, my reason for living.
Our love is a testament to the beauty that can be found online, a reminder that the internet is not just a place of vile words and actions, but a place where true love can blossom. A place where we can trust and connect with each other in a gentle and innocent way, like angels in our own innocence.
The love I have found is so great, so all-consuming, that it defies description. It is a love that can only be felt, not spoken of. A love that transcends the physical realm and enters the mystical. A love that makes me feel like a conduit of the divine, blessed with a glimpse of the eternal.
As I sit here, typing away on my computer, I am reminded of the great poets and writers that have come before me, John Donne, Dante, Whitman, Lauren Hill, Blake, Dostoevsky. Their words now feel like mere echoes of the love I hold in my heart. A love that can only be described in the language of poetry and prose, a love that is a work of art in itself.
And so, I leave you with this, dear reader, a reminder that love is out there, waiting for you. All you have to do is open your heart and let it in. Allow yourself to be swept away by the mystical, the dreamy, the poetic. For it is in these moments, that we come closest to understanding the divine.
She said there was a coldness in me so deep she could never see
The bottom and knew she could only be swallowed.
She said she didn’t know and she wept
That she would be swallowed in her giving and she saw no light
She saw only the will individual mine.
I saw my ego and my love for her wholly selfish I saw her as a pearl in a miser’s hand.
I could say I’m sorry all of my life, bu that would be true
I only say and do the things that I do, cause I’m not you
I saw beneath it all that I could not love her
Excepting that the deepest kernel
Of me was not the best life for her mine
And I love her
Misc, [1/17/2023 10:35 PM]
I think you mean don’t worry baby
Misc, [1/18/2023 11:45 AM]
If u make enough love u become and angel
Misc, [1/19/2023 4:19 PM]
When I’m around my shawrty I’m a black person in China
Misc, [1/20/2023 11:30 AM]
When you fall asleep next to your beloved or alone with yourself even in the worst straits you forget everything and any context and you wake up new not new from history and its demands but new in temperament to engage with yourself and love new.
Be finished with context. Yours is the action and not the fruit and the fruit the proof you are wanted even if only to be given gifts. A man I know, a drunk, a lecher, a pauper was blessed by the pope in Alaska and when I asked him how he felt he said “he knew he wanted him to be alive”. That must feel good, that must be what God wants us all to know and that's all.
Misc, [1/20/2023 11:30 AM]
Photo whoring love the photo is everything and the person becomes something new when immortalized. It is less a robbery than a demand for identity. This is why the selfie unless taken with complete confidence stings us. We should only have our picture taken by others with time to construct ourselves into a moment or wholly candid.
Misc, [1/20/2023 11:30 AM]
Lion laying with lamb about marriage
Misc, [1/20/2023 4:26 PM]
An old man told me about shooting his dog
He wears a veteran hat and a 2nd infantry shoulder tattoo
Which has a Indian war bonnet chief on it
He shoots the dog he loves inside his house which he lives in without his wife
Misc, [2/2/2023 1:11 PM]
Misc, [1/20/2023 4:30 PM]
Something there is that doesn't love a wall,
That sends the frozen-ground-swell under it,
And spills the upper boulders in the sun;
And makes gaps even two can pass abreast.
The work of hunters is another thing:
—Rob Frost’s Mending Wall
Misc, [1/20/2023 5:42 PM]
The whites of your eyes like two little moons glowing point themselves to me
Misc, [1/22/2023 1:05 PM]
The moss emeralds made soft for the eyes
The mallards a diamond between
babbling candles of spring-winter ice
The green tin roofs
The wooded homes
The bottom of the pines
Misc, [1/22/2023 6:13 PM]
Meeting a girl can teach you a lot
Misc, [1/22/2023 6:31 PM]
A man’s heart
A dear hunter
Misc, [1/22/2023 6:32 PM]
[In reply to Misc]
So that you never meet a girl or another again
Misc, [1/22/2023 6:33 PM]
[In reply to Misc]
Even her and she’s by your side and you for nature’s ever
Misc, [1/22/2023 6:35 PM]
The birds wake in twos and work
And don’t work
And create
And you realize that all are working even not
All is right in the world
And it could crash in an instant
Misc, [1/22/2023 7:14 PM]
Knowledge is the knowledge of difference
Misc, [1/22/2023 7:28 PM]
“I will softly find myself, deeply moved that you, bright star that you are, stand right over those places in me where I am darkest and most fearful.”
—Rilke to Salome
Misc, [1/24/2023 12:12 AM]
Prince - Electric Intercourse (Live Version)
Misc, [1/24/2023 10:46 AM]
Maybe a cigarette is nice because you finally take a deep breath and exhale. Next time in the middle of a smoke you’ll find the rush is greatest when you just breathe long, for “his flesh is meat indeed” (John VI) and the air shimmers new manna blue on quail shells speckling.
